My boyfriend is a cat person.
I am not a cat person.
Growing up as a Persian girl in the early 2000’s, the most typical email address, social network ID, or MSN messenger status update you could have created was ♡P3ršìāņ ćäţ♡ – the weird spelling with the numbers and the odd accents was an added bonus to make it look more unoriginal.
Persian girls are kind, spoiled, have strong eyeliner game, and often get plastic surgery on their faces to make them look flatter – much like a Persian cat! #allthenosejobs
However, I can’t deny that there’s something super butterfly-effect-y when your non-Iranian boyfriend makes you feel like a Persian Kitty. Please note that I’m referring to the butterflies in my gut going all psycho, and not the movie with Ashton Kutcher and the thing where he travels through time and space by way of photographs (oh look, FINALLY a movie I’ve actually watched and can reference like an adult. Could this be the non-Iranian-Boyfriend-effect?! I’m afraid not… My boyfriend made a reference to The Matrix yesterday, and I had to half pretend like I knew what he was talking about. I watched the film censored and dubbed in Farsi – which means I watched a totally different movie… still working on those cultural references guys.)
I’m not a cat person and back when I was still single (like 3 weeks ago), my Bumble profile bio said that I preferred dogs over cats and gin over wine – I thought this was an effective filter to get the wine drinkers out of the way and get the hard-liquor drinking crowd interested. I’ve been through a divorce so I wanted to go on a date with someone that would take shots with me and eat dirty nachos, rather than slowly sip on a glass of wine over a candlelit dinner and talk about “feelings”. Less “what’s your relationship with your mom like?” and more “let’s discuss our earliest childhood traumas!”
I’m not a cat person, but the dog vs. cat debate on the dating Apps is as clichèd as the spelling of ♡P3ršìāņ ćäţ♡. This is one that everyone mentions on their profile bio’s (yeah in hindsight I should have probably put a bit more effort into it for originality if I wanted to meet someone decent). Not in the exact words that follow, but most people have something along the lines of “I love dogs (which directly translates to ‘I’m a better person than you are’). If you have a dog I’m going to swipe right so I can send you a stupid opener about how ‘we should go on a date just so that I can pet your dog’. And if I have a dog, I’m going to post a cute picture of him here so you automatically assume that I’m an emotionally mature person and can handle responsibilities” (spoiler alert: they aren’t/don’t).
I sympathize completely with my brothers and sisters who still have to put on a brave face and go out there and date! It’s easy to fall into the trap of the dating cliques… are you a dog person or a cat person? Do you like pineapple on your pizza? Netflix or clubbing? Do you know the difference between “your” and “you’re”? OK literacy is so important, but you shouldn’t judge your potential significant other based on fruits on pizza. It’s all about picking your battles and compromising with your babe (oh hi babe, speaking of making compromises, Imma need to sleep on the right side of the bed from now on – it’s a left-handed thing.)
Oh and speaking of babes, this past weekend I learned that my boyfriend isn’t a big fan of fruits in general, but pineapple on pizza is totally acceptable?! My Persian mom is going to FREAK OUT! We’re holding off on introducing families until further notice.
I may not be a cat person, but I do have cat-like sensibilities. I purr when I’m being petted and I’m gracefully clumsy: I bump into walls, TV’s, poles and other immobile objects on a daily basis, and have constant bruises on my arms and legs to the point that I’m secretly dreading dress-season because I always look like a bruised apple.
I may not be a cat person, but I appreciate a cat’s need for constant attention and their inconceivable levels of sass, since I tend to have an attitude on most days myself (also known as sassy Toos’days). My boyfriend has 2 cats – well now he has three including me I guess… He feeds us all on time and gives us cuddles and hugs when we head butt him, and honestly what else could a ♡P3ršìāņ ćäţ♡ ask for?
Having been enlightened through this amazing journey of my new- yet super mature relationship, I’d like to think that the dog vs. cat controversy is just propaganda perpetrated to keep individuals apart from each other based on what sort of cute lil pet they want to love.
So if I may offer you some advice as someone who has been through it all (well, at least for like 14.5 days) is to get off the dating Apps and look for a cute guy at work instead!
Also, keep an open mind – maybe not with pineapple on pizza – but a sweet, amazing, cat-owner sitting across from you over a candlelit dinner, giving you ALL the butterflies? Why not??!
The Married Girl On Bumble 
“a cat’s need for constant attention ”
Funny, cat persons say that about dogs. Our cats sleep more or less 16 hours a day, and of the remaining 8 they wash for 4 (not in one go!) … so that constant attention thing is not even possible with a cat – they do not have that much time for you, are famous for ignoring persons (particularly those that want to get closer to them) and are probably the most free spirits among pets. Cats are not pack animals. They at most live in not very close families, endure each others (and hence the human) presence and the only reason why my cat sticks to me is because she knows she gets treats … and petting her gets rid of some hairs for her without her having to use her tongue.
If you think a cat is craving constant attention, never, ever get a child. Or even worse, a dog.
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If I could sleep for 16 hours a day and only get up for cuddles and treats, I would!! But you are totally correct. Cats are way more independent than dogs (and kids)!
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I have to admit, some breeds are more attention seeking than others. Siamese cats are a famous example. But your average barn cat is not.
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What about Persian cats?
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